TW: This article discusses topics that may be distressing or triggering. Please practice self-care + discretion while reading, and visit our Resources page for additional support.
Marlee Liss is a survivor, author, restorative justice advocate, and founder of Survivors 4 Justice Reform. S4JR is a global coalition of sexual violence, human trafficking + domestic violence survivors + allies united to advance policy change that challenges the failures and violence of punitive, carceral systems. Marlee's work is helping thousands of survivors imagine a form of justice rooted in healing, humanity, accountability + love. Read on to learn how Marlee is breaking the cycle of violence + dehumanization by choosing love as a force for change.
How do you define a "Cycle Breaker?"
A cycle breaker is someone who refuses to pass on the pain, violence or dehumanization they endured. It's someone who reflects on their values and commits to embodying the movements they are fighting for every single day. It's someone who, despite having survived the worst experiences, continues to believe in a safer, softer, more loving world. It's someone who does everything in their power to move us toward the version of the world they want to live in.
What adversities or experiences have you lived through?
In 2016, I was raped by a stranger in a violent act that lasted nearly five hours. For the next three years I endured the pain of secondary victimization within the criminal 'justice' system. Eventually, I went in search of a different justice pathway - one that would truly support my healing and break cycles of violence. I'm endlessly grateful that I was able to access a restorative justice process that was transformative for everyone involved.
What is a cycle, belief or pattern you’ve worked to break or challenge in your life?
After sharing my story of restorative justice for sexual trauma, I began hearing from tens of thousands of survivors from around the world. There were survivors saying, "why did no one tell me I had justice options beyond court or nothing?" and "I wish I knew about this". Those stories have become the fuel for me in doing the work I do, which is raising awareness for justice options and ensuring survivors who want these processes have access to them. In this way, I am committed to breaking the cycle of harm that happens through the so-called 'justice' system. I believe in a version of justice that is truly healing, one that refuses dehumanization and holds the possibility of genuine safety in our world.
What helped you begin healing, growing, or changing that cycle?
Writing played a crucial role in my healing. After trauma, I struggled with self-blame, panic attacks, eating disorders and depression. I was so mad at my body and could not connect with my typical outlets for emotional processing, mainly dance. So, I found myself reaching for the pen. I'd wake up in the middle of the night and write disjointed poetry. It was a release that allowed me to get destructive thoughts out of my body and onto the page. Beyond that, sharing my writing has allowed me to disrupt the isolation and shame I was carrying. My writing has been a bridge, leading me to connect with other survivors who share in solidarity and understanding. Together, we are powerful.
What are your proudest accomplishments?
Before my Zaida (grandpa) passed, he told me he is proud of me for always choosing love. This is perhaps my greatest accomplishment. I refused to become anything like the toxicity I stand against and I'm proud of my spirit for that. On a more tangible level, I'm proud of publishing my writing, being the subject of a documentary, sharing my story with +100,000 people around the world, delivering trainings and talks for prosecutors, therapists, educators, nurses and more. I'm also proud of launching Survivors 4 Justice Reform in 2024, a global coalition of GBV survivors and ally's advocating for restorative and transformative justice. Today, we are nearly 1,000 strong with +30 chapters around the world.
Is there a message, quote, lesson, or reminder you’d like to share with others who may be struggling along their healing journey?
"Everything you're feeling, call it love" - Andrea Gibson. I carry this quote as a life motto. The anger, the rage, the hurt, the grief, the joy, the sorrow - it all reflects how deeply we love and care. Even in my deepest depression, I saw that my despair was a reflection of how strongly I had expected love in this world and how I had believed so fully in humanity. Healing often looked like the recognition that even my trauma responses were attempts at self-protection and therefore, they too are love.
Do you have any projects you're working on that you'd like to highlight?
I am so excited that my memoir is being released with Penguin Random House in February 2027. This book has been my favourite labour of love and is over four years in the making. "If I Had Known Then: A Memoir of Sexual Assault, Hope & My Battle to Re-Imagine Justice" explores my journey of survival, re-victimization through court, healing through restorative justice, reclaiming joy, re-defining masculinity, challenging objectification and so much more. For more details + 3 letters I wrote to all survivors and future readers, visit: www.marleeliss.com/firstwave
Connect with Marlee:
- Visit her website: marleeliss.com
- Instagram: @marleeliss + @survivors4justicereform